This story is fictional, but it is based on real experiences that many different people have had on their first visit to the home of Whitehawk, a small but progressive football club on the Sussex Coast. Where diversity is celebrated, and bigotry is not accepted. A place where the fans loudly sing “no homophobia, no sexism and no racism”. A place where football is for all.
Created for the community.
Dick:
Everyone we've interviewed on the Hawk Talk podcast, from players to officials to fans and sponsors, has a story to tell about how they came to Whitehawk.
It struck me that we should write a musical in celebration of the diverse and fascinating collection of people involved with the club. Here it is!
Ollie:
This musical has been one of the most immersive, rewarding and pleasurable experiences - working remotely and creating as a collective has brought its own challenges but it has also enabled us to produce a highly competent, engaging and meaningful work that I’m incredibly proud of. I wanted to try and capture the spirit of the club – from the eclectic humour of the terraces to the more serious messages of equality and inclusion - I hope the fans love what we’ve created for them.
Odds:
Funky!!
If you get invited to be an Isolator... to put some ideas forward for a Musical on a cold dark February evening in lockdown IV, you don’t say no! you say “yes!” ...and if I’m invited to the party , I ain’t leaving till the end and I’m not gonna sit quietly in the corner... it has always been that way with me... as a creative person by nature, to be part of this beautiful creation makes me immensely proud... Whitehawk fandom has always been about having more fun than anyone else... as a diverse group who’s #footballforall message will never fail...
... life’s a gas...
Eve:
The classic fairytale story of boy meets football club… boy falls in love with football club… they all live happily ever after. It’s a story that pretty much resonates with the majority of our ultras. I like to think that our people and, to be honest, any other non-league loved will connect with. Enjoy!
Woody:
I’ve always loved acting so when Dad showed me the script for Whitehawk: The Musical I couldn’t contain myself! Because it was the first script I’d ever acted (hopefully not the last!) and it was for something that I loved – Whitehawk FC!!!
Every time I practiced it I felt like a pro! And when it came to actually recording it I was nervous but still very excited. It went really well! Hearing the first take back I realized just good it sounded, like a real conversation. I loved rehearsing, acting and finally listening to the finished play!
lyrics
THE SONGS
INCLUSION (starts at 1:55)
Solution: Inclusion, it’s what we believe
We won't change ever, the way that we’re seen
The ultras: A family, on foundations of love
The haters: not welcome, we’ll give ‘em the shove
Everyone is welcome, from far and near
Forget your anger No room for it here
We are Whitehawk we won't be bound
No discrimination here at this ground
All ages, all rainbows, lighting the way
No violence, or bigots – just go away
The passion, the heartbeat, is second to none
Don’t expect to go quietly, coz that’s never done
We have a message, we make it quite clear
If United: we’re stronger, and louder to hear
So join us, and say it – we’ll make the sun shine
We’re changing perspectives, one fan at a time
Inclusion
THE LOBSTER (5:15)
I came up from the seashore
I was looking for a home
For a place that I felt safe in
Where I wouldn't be alone
It's not easy as a lobster
With a hard shell and a claw
People never see the real me
All they see is thermidor
I've been ridiculed, derided,
But it's here I'll state my case
I really only want to see
a smile upon your face
Legend has it, that I’ve travelled
From a place that’s cold n wet
Found my home at the enclosed ground
And I'm not leaving yet
Say hello, if you see me
It's a time for celebration
If you’re not sure what I look like
I’m the red 5 foot crustacean
At the game I'm with my people
The ones who understand
They never judge me
With an Irn Bru in my hand
THE REFEREE'S A REFEREE (8:31)
I took a breath and blew my whistle,
Expecting incivility
then I heard these words
the referee's a referee
It was not what I expected
I think that's plain to see
This was something new
the referee's a referee
I’ve been a child born out of wedlock and an onanist to boot
how much money was I paid to make sure their team lose
It's a big surprise but welcome
and I can't disagree they're absolutely right
the referee's a referee
I wonder why I do it, I'm the villain of the show but I'll go home all smiles tonight but I won't let them know
I look forward to the next time I'll give a penalty just so I can hear the referee's a referee
It's absolutely wonderful and such a joy to be
back where they can call the referee a referee
JJ's SONG (12:00)
Capture the moment – encapture the mood
Spot something new that nobody’s viewed
A voice so loud - but rarely heard
A picture paints a thousand words
Life through a lens, watch the play unfold
only one chance to harness the gold
The shutter clicks with clarity
And holds it for prosperity
He understands this club, the passion
While others follow the obvious fashions
Our man records the true fan’s heart
He’s one of our own, just taking his part
His box is loaded and ready primed
To frame the world one shot at a time
While we jump and celebrate
His eye is on the shot to take
Eye of an eagle and heart of a hawk
He lets his camera do all the talk
Puts into focus a world that’s blurred
his pictures paint a thousand words
He understands this club, the passion
While others follow the obvious fashions
Our man records the true fan’s heart
He’s one of our own, just taking his part
You can see him, or maybe you can’t
A fly on wall, a random chant
But you know a his work for sure
‘cause JJs caught you before
JJ’s caught you before
JJ’s caught you before
FUNKY VOLUNTEERS (15:40)
Who greets you at the gate
Who never turns up late
Who sits in the container
Who books the entertainer
Who throws away the cans
They sanitise the stands
Who plots and make the plans
Who cleans the toilet pans
We are the funky volunteers
Down at the club
We don’t do it for the pay
We do it for love
We are the funky volunteers
Down at the club
We don’t do it for the pay
It’s a Labour of love
Who weeds the common land
Who sells the merchandise
Sells 50/50 from the Shack
Who keeps the club on track
Who’s fully dedicated
Committed to the cause
Who hung the disco ball
All for one and one for all
WE WUNT BE DRUV (20:05)
Standing up, and standing tall
We wun't be druv, We wun't be druv
This is where football's for all
We wun't be druv at all
The hawks are flying with the dove
We Wunt Be Druv, We Wunt be Druv
Side by side, love with love
We Wunt Be Druv at all
We’ll sing it ‘til our throats are raw
We’ll sing it so you can't ignore
Passion like fire / peace like dove
We Wunt be Druv, We Wunt be Druv
In salty air we hoist our flag
We wun't be druv, We wun't be druv
All hands on deck, we can’t be gagged
We wun't be druv at all
Against the tide, we’ll stand with Pride
We wun't be druv, We wun't be druv
We'll sing it loud and never hide
We Wunt Be Druv at all
Sussex, the land by the Sea
Come join us and you will see
The best of us and you won't be
Wunt Be Druv at all
Stand with us, all kindred souls
We Wunt Be Druv, We Wunt Be Druv
In unity our voices bold
We Wunt Be Druv at all
Our message clear, it's from the hill
We Wunt Be Druv, We Wunt Be Druv
If you ain’t heard, then you soon will
We Wunt Be Druv at all
Our Sisters and our brothers cheers
Say it Til the whole world hears
We're Whitehawk and we'll make it clear
We Wunt Be Druv at all
In unity we stand together
Rain or shine what 'err the weather
Sing with pride “Whitehawk forever”
We wunt be druv at all
credits
THE CREDITS
The dialogue was recorded at Whitehawk FC so thanks to Andy Schofield for allowing us to use the ground and Stephen Wrench for invaluable advice.
Big sister – Eve Plumridge
Little Bro – Woody Learmonth
Random fan & radio announcer - Kevin Miller
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